Hold your applause

Do you remember when you were in school and one of your classmates presented something in front of the class, when he or she was finished, everyone clapped?

Well, they still do that. I know it’s for moral support, and I find it really cute and sweet that they still do that for each other.

Here’s something I’ve noticed, though: the second they think the presentation is over, this kind of mechanical, half-hearted clapping starts, as if someone is holding up a flashing “APPLAUSE” sign behind the presenter’s head to elicit the perfunctory noise of hands smacking together to either acknowledge a job well done, or to celebrate the fact that it’s “finally over”.

So one time I confronted them on it. Here is what I said (more or less):

“Look, I’m glad you guys clap for each other. I think that’s important. You want to be supportive, and…when you do that half-hearted clappy thing that you’re doing, the message is kind of like, ‘We’re just acknowledging that you’re up there and not much else’. If that’s your reason, just hold your applause altogether. If you’re going to bother applauding for the person, and you really want to do it, then clap like you mean it. Will you do that?”

They giggled and nodded. Then I said this:

“I have a rule about hugs. My rule is that if you’re going to give me a hug, give me an awesome hug or don’t touch me! None of this ‘butt-out, one-arm pat-on-the-back just-doing-it-to-get-it-done’ crap!”

Giggles again swept the room. I said, “I want you to keep my hugging rule in mind next time you applaud for your classmates. In fact, I want you to keep my hugging rule in mind next time you do anything.”

Do you know how many people are on automatic pilot?

Most of them.

Do you know how many people go through life just doing for the sake of doing? Just moving from one thing to another, floating purposelessly? Awake but distracted? Alive but unconscious?

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want the person cutting my hair to be distracted. I don’t want the person performing surgery on someone I love to be on automatic pilot. Or the person working on my car’s brakes. Or the person driving in the opposite direction.

I totally want those people to be present, to be aware and awake. To be doing what they’re doing with purpose behind it.

And the truth is that if we’re living purposelessly in one place, we’re probably being that way in other places. Actually, probably in most places.

So next time you go to give someone a hug, or clap for him, or share the road with her, please…do it with all of you.

Please, live like you mean it.

Will you do that?