“I can’t” is usually a lie
Truth: I used to be the worst at sending back RSVPs. Most of the time, I let them just fall off my radar. And other times…I avoided them entirely. If I knew I did not want to attend the event, I just didn’t respond. So, instead of being honest (and providing the commonest of courtesies and sending back a reply), I would avoid it for as long as possible. Usually a week or so after the “RSVP by” date had passed (or until the event organizer contacted me to see if I was coming), I would send a perfunctory text message or e-mail message that usually sounded something like this:
“I’m so sorry! I meant to respond earlier - I can’t make it on the [10th]. I have something else going on that day. Thank you anyway for the invitation! Have a great time!”
Yikes.
It makes me shudder even to type that.
I have, of course, learned the lesson and handle RSVPs much more carefully now. If I am absolutely certain that I have something else going on that day, I respond right away and say so. If I am certain that I do not have something else going on that day, but I am choosing not to attend, I will reply in a way similar to the following:
“Thank you for the invitation. I won’t be there to celebrate with you; I’m sending you my best for a happy and fun-filled day.”
The phrase “I can’t” no longer even enters my mind, and doesn’t come close to making it into my reply.
“I can’t” becomes so ingrained in our minds and into our vocabulary that most of us don’t give a second thought to using it, and using it often. The thing is: we can. Perhaps we just don’t want to, or are choosing something else. Saying “I can’t”, even once, takes our power away from us. We forget that we really can do anything we want to do.
Words are very powerful. Thoughts are even more powerful. What we think, we believe, and what we believe, we create.
The ability to make choices is one of the mightiest gifts we have as human beings. Owning your choices will ultimately help you create an incredibly powerful life.
You totally can!